“Its cancer.” You never imagine hearing those words, especially at 12 years old. That one word changed my life forever, but I never knew just how different life would be from that point onward. All I knew was that I would have to fight very hard and try to be brave.
My life was completely normal, and the morning of October 27th 2010 was no different. I was a ‘normal’ 12 year old girl, but within five minutes my life would start to go downhill. The lump appeared very quickly on my left side of my neck. I remember telling my mum straight away, at first glance we thought it was just my glands until my parents realised it was a golf ball sized lump, not a swollen gland. The next day was a Monday and my mum and I took a trip to the doctors , which lead to a trip to a local hospital. I remember a few doctors in my hospital bay and demanding blood tests, x-rays and an ultrasound.
A CT scan was booked for the next day at the Royal Marsden, I still can picture what the children’s area looked like and the names of all the doctors and nurses. The scan was completed, and in a little room I was told the results. “Its cancer” Hodgkin’s Lymphoma, by the time we found out it had spread to my lungs, liver and spleen so it was a stage 3. The next step was having a portacath put in. It was under the skin on my left side under my arm, near my bra strap. This was done under general anaesthetic. Whilst they were doing that operation they took a biopsy of the large lump on my neck and did a bone marrow test. The bone marrow was clear but the biopsy confirmed it was cancer.
The chemotherapy started shortly after the operation, this was in November. My four rounds of chemo took place in November, December, January and February. It was a very intense form of chemotherapy and I had to take a lot of tablets too. I lost my hair very quickly it was within a couple of weeks of staring the chemo. I remember finding hair on my pillow and it would break of in clumps from my scalp. So I made the decision to shave it all of ! It felt better having no hair than having hair falling out all of the time.
The chemotherapy was a struggle with nausea, extreme tiredness and a lot of bloating and weight gain from the steroids I had to take, there were many other horrid symptoms too. It was February when I started having terrible pain in my right knee, x-rays and an MRI later we found out I had bone damage in both knees but mainly my right knee. I call it AVN but the full name is Avascular Necrosis. This is where the bone dies in the joint. I was told to use crutches and a wheelchair for long distances.
I was finally put in remission at the beginning of March 2011, I was so excited but I still knew that life would never be the same, I was left with a lot of problems and damage caused by the chemotherapy, including:
- Heart damage, (which has now improved a bit and is on the lower end of normal.)
- Neuropathy problems, large and small fibre neuropathy.
- stomach issues.
- low immune system
- chronic fatigue syndrome
I go into more detail in my health story. Read HERE
Now I have to go to different specialist hospitals for some of these problems. After I was put in remission I was put onto monthly checks. I would have an x-ray every time I went and an ultrasound every other time. I was then put onto four monthly checks, and then six monthly checks. It took me a little longer to reach these milestones as I had so many other problems and a low immune system. I have recently been put onto yearly checks, it was such a big milestone to reach as I have come such a long way. You go onto yearly check ups after you have reached the five years post chemotherapy mark which I was so excited to reach!
All of the doctors and nurses have been absolutely incredible to me and I will never be able to thank them enough for saving my life! My family and friends helped me so much and I’m so grateful for them. I will be forever grateful for life, even if things are tough along the way!
Cancer doesn’t define me, even if it did change me.
megan white 